KEEP OFF (D) ANGER

In Saint Thiruvalluvar words, “That conduct is virtue which is free from these four things, viz-malice, desire, anger and bitter speech” (Kural35).

“If a man would guard himself, let him guard against anger: If he do not guard it,anger will kill him” (Kural 305).

You would have come across people who get ignited (like a match stick without brain) at the slightest friction; some others seem to be balanced, but when they feel angry they actually explode to the core.

Wrath, fury, rage — whatever you call it, anger is an aggressive emotion. Unfortunately, it’s neither helpful nor useful. Whatever shape it takes, uncontrolled anger can negatively affect physical health and emotional wellbeing.

In reality anger is the least effective way to get people perform or behave “correctly” as you deemed fit. Though some times anger does have the odd pay-off like your spouse remembers not to strangulate tooth paste tube or switch off bath lights - it happens at the cost of warmth and tends to come back to hurt you. 

Anger can increase stress-related problems -insomnia, digestive problems, headaches and chances of developing coronary heart disease. Anger can also contribute to violent and risky behaviors, including drug and alcohol use. And on top of all that, anger can significantly damage relationships with family, friends and colleagues.

Fortunately, there are techniques you can learn to help you keep your anger in check:

1. Understand and accept that anger is a problem.

2. Keep a log book of anger: If you keep a daily anger log and review it every month you will be surprised to understand what went wrong and how easy it would have been if your action was little more thoughtful and emphathetic. The log help you to recognize the signs, step away from the situation or try relaxation techniques to prevent your irritation from escalating.

3. Let Go: Some people have a tendency to keep on recalling the incident that made them mad. Instead, try to let go off the past incident. One way to do that is to focus instead on things you appreciate about the person or the situation that made you angry.

4.Change the way you think: You can replace unhelpful negative thoughts with more reasonable ones. 

5.Use logic: Even when justified, anger can quickly become irrational. Keep reminding yourself that the world is not out to get you. 

6.Focused breathing: Shallow breathing is angry breathing. Practice taking controlled, slow breaths and observe each breath coming up from your belly rather than your chest.

7.Use imagery: Visualize a relaxing experience from your memory or your imagination.

8.Get active: Regular physical exercise can help you decompress, burn off extra tension and reduce stress that can fuel angry outbursts.

Recognize and avoid triggers. You can’t completely eliminate angry feelings. But you can make changes to the way those events affect you, and the ways in which you respond. By making the effort to keep your anger in check, you and the people close to you will be happier for the long run.