Catechism students celebrate Mothers Day every year. Some years ago, on one occasion, a Catechist asked the students of his Confirmation class, to write a letter to their mothers. He said, “You can write whatever comes to your mind. Your thoughts and your feelings”. He then walked around the class, observing them. He noticed, some girls seated together looked pensive, took time to write. So he asked them, “Why did you not begin to write?” About 3 or 4 of them, together replied saying, “they are partial to their sons”. The teacher aged 55 years was taken aback as he did not expect such a statement from them. He was not aware, such discrimination prevailed. He thought for a while and addressed the emotional distress they go through, for no fault of theirs.
He said to them,“I feel sad and upset. I don’t know how best to deal with this matter. What comes to my mind now is a question i.e, if you harbour such thoughts in your mind, and even if you think justified, will you not begin to feel resentment towards your mother and that in turn may cause hostile behaviour from you? These injurious thoughts and behaviour can hamper your concentration in studies. This in turn badly affects your present and your future. So, I think the best option for your own benefit, is to think of the good things mother has done for you”. He continued. “You could carry out the following exercise later at home.
Go back in time. See yourself as a foetus being nurtured and nourished in your mother’s womb for nine months. Then look back to your development from babyhood to childhood, and from childhood to adolescence. Surely, your mother has fulfilled at least your minimum requirements. Otherwise, how could you reach the present stage you are in now? Recall how in times of illness she was by your side and when required, spending sleepless nights to nurse you back to health.
Things are not different now. Three of four mothers said, they are aware of this preferential treatment, while a fourth, who has a son and a daughter replied saying, “my daughter always complains that I am partial towards her brother”. The Catechist briefed the mother of the harm she inflicts on her daughter, and suggested remedial measures to undo the hurt caused.
Measures: Remedial and Preventive
Remedial: The aggrieved daughter ought to tell her grievance to the mother, after a short prayer. Guidance in this matter, i.e. when and how to convey, can be obtained from the School Counsellor or any other Counsellor.
So, this gives an opportunity to the mother to respond appropriately.
Preventive: 1. Jesus’s Teaching, “Do to others what you would want them to do to you”(Mathew 7:12 and Luke 6:31) we are informed that this is a Universal Teaching is a guidance for mothers in this matter. In case the mother overlooks this instruction, is she not committing a sin, for sin as defined by Jesus, given in John 16:9 is, “about sin, because they do not believe in me”. If the mother believed in Jesus, she would not have violated this Teaching.
