We gathered all the children, little girls, teenage girls and young girls stepping into womanhood. They were asking many questions. Who are the Kuki women? Why were they walking naked? Why were the men surrounding them, parading them, touching them in the most violative manner and treating them in such a horrific way? Why were no men stopping this crime? Why were no police called and no police stopping this violation? Why were no humans taking action?
The children said they could instantly remember the traumas they had faced during their childhood.
Each began to recall instances from their childhood, teenage years and then growing into womanhood. Each was pensive. Then came a flood of statements whilst sharing the horrific instances each had encountered at the mercy of a man/men.
‘I was touched on my chest when I was in school by my school teacher. I felt like I was abused. I wanted to quit school.’
‘The rickshaw driver who would pick me up to drop to school would always have his pants unzipped. I felt disgusted. I did not want to go to school anymore.’
‘When a group of us used to play on the open ground next to the neighbours house, the owner, who was newly married, would open the back door slightly to reveal his penis and naked body. We felt a sense of danger. We stopped playing there.’
‘When my friend would walk to college, the path and grounds leading to the college used to be deserted, with scrub vegetation. Often a man would ride on his bike in circles and would always have his pants unzipped revealing his penis and he would make lewd gestures. She would fear going to college. She would ask me to accompany her.’
‘When I was a kid and had learnt cycling, a man followed me and cornered me and then suddenly shoved his hands in my panties. I felt scared, violated.’
‘When I would travel by bus to college, there would be a lewd remark or gesture made by fellow male passengers in the crowded bus towards me or the other girls/women. No one would stop it. No one would intervene. We were left to the mercy of the outrageous men. I felt angry, isolated and defeated. I didn’t want to travel by bus.’
‘Whenever I was late walking home, I would have to look back a million times to feel safe. If there were other people walking on the path, I felt safe if there were elderly persons or other women.’
‘My sister was critically injured when a boy following her threw acid on her face. She has not recovered from the nightmare.’
‘My father is sick. He posts about women on social media in a very derogatory way. I feel ashamed. I feel sad’
‘My brother watches pornographic videos all the time. His friends also watch rape videos. I feel uncomfortable when he is around and feel unsafe when he speaks to me abusively.’
‘My cousin slipped into the bathroom when I was having a bath and tried to force himself on me. I was alone. I ran away to my grandmother’s house and refused to go back. I felt terrified and traumatised.’
‘My friend was raped by a man from her neighbourhood. They all lived in a shanty in the small lanes in the city core and no one believed her. She is living with this trauma and is unable to study or work.’
‘My mother is beaten by my father when he gets angry and I fear I will be next. Please save us.’
Teacher, when we participated in the Bilkis Bano protest, we learnt so much about the criminal acts on Bilkis and her family during the Gujarat Riots nearly 20 years ago. Mobs of men chasing them like monsters out to only ravage and kill.
With Manipur, the same incidents seem to be repeating. And the victims are a large number of women and children.
‘Teacher, why is it that when a man gets angry he vents all his anger on a woman? Teacher, why is it that in war, civil dispute and community clashes, a woman and her children are made the target of man/men’s ire? He hits her, chases her, throws acid on her, parades her naked, rapes her, murders her.’
Isn’t it a woman that gave birth to a man? Isn’t it a woman that nurtures and raises a man? Isn’t it a woman that loves and cares for a man? Isn’t it a woman that nurses and heals a man when unwell or ill?
When did a man become inhuman? When did a man become a monster? That he could rise up shamelessly and attack the very human that nurtured him?
And where are the rest of the men? The good men, the ones that are humane, empathetic? Every moment that an injustice and atrocity is committed on women and children, there seems to be no man willing to muster up the courage to speak up and take action.
Will we have to continue seeing naked women paraded around as an object of a man’s wrath? Will we have to continue seeing men often justifying violence on a woman as a way of scaring the country amidst ethnic, communal and political differences?
Is this all that we have learnt? To be angry, to be violent and to let women bear the brunt by disrobing them, raping them, killing them? Is that why you like to call us the weaker sex? And that the only way men can show their might is by committing crimes against women? That seems to be the only naked truth staring at us. Are you willing to change that, O Man?
(Tallulah D’Silva is an Architect and silver awardee of the Golden Door Award 2020 for truth and integrity.)
