Domination first started from animal in the form of ‘survival of the fittest’. It drummed into humans with the pride of skills of hunters, tool makers and even with doormen who had the power to control entry in and out of nightclubs; it influenced the field of government by dominating other nations with disagreeableness; and affected innocent individuals with fear of shaming with insults and brute force.
A person who has a low self-respect or unsolved problems, and jealousy, desires to dominate others by putting them into shame; with verbal abuse, or by spreading false rumours to humiliate and damage any person’s reputation; just to make up for one’s own shortcomings and thus gain a false sense of superiority.
Anyone who is weak, helpless, poor or belonging to a lower caste or class can be a victim of shame in the hands of a persecutor. The impact and effect of shame, on the victim, is a painful emotional stress to bear. Those who put others into shame may have to face retaliation — because some believe that, “God has given them not the spirit of fear; but of power, of love and peace.” (2Timothy 1:7). So, victims may indulge in ‘tit-for-tat’ at least to temporarily reduce their feelings of shame and stop people’s mocking laughter at them. Their self-defense may appear like that of animals entering human habitation and attacking people when their environment is destroyed by flattening hills and chopping trees by humans. But some victims suppress the shame: “Not because their tormentors deserve forgiveness; but because they as victims, need peace” as Jonathan Lockwood would say. Still others become victims willfully as they are camp followers.
Shame is what all of us have in common, to greater or lesser extent. It can lower the self-respect of an individual and lead to, depression and other mental health issues for the victim — the targeted sufferer. Shaming or teasing by classmates, may render dropouts in schools; shaming at workplace by colleagues, can cause unproductive atmosphere with the possibility of fights; or within homes by in-laws, it may lead the victim to commit suicide.
If shaming and insulting incidents are swept under the carpet by responsible persons, or with advice to compromise with their tormentors; then it means authorities are avoiding their responsibility to teach the persecutors to change by drilling in them the fact; “Do not do to others what you do not wish done to yourself. Wish for others what you desire and wish for yourself,” in the words of Confucius, a Chinese philosopher.
If wrongs are not corrected, it can be repeated again and bullies lose the chance of improving their conduct; and they will never learn to respect people with gentle words, loving heart and polished behaviour; and innocent victims will have to suffer mental torture alone in different situations of life.
Therefore, some action should be taken by authorities and parents to stop torturers in schools, end annoyance at workplaces and halt harassment within homes.
After Cain killed his brother out of jealousy and God asked him where is Abel? Cain replied, “Am I my brother’s keeper?” (Gen.4:9). Cain’s expression appears as denial and evasion of responsibility. But in a broader moral principle of caring, “we are “our brother’s keeper” — a sense of communal responsibility. Even Heads of government should not only speak; but also breathe constitutional democracy of secularism. We have to be our brother’s keeper.
