He did not want to get married to have a
child. Yusuf Khan a music teacher in Dubai with a British school realised his
dream on his 12th attempt in Goa. 36-year-old Yusuf Khan, originally
from Pune, said that the decision to become a single parent was due to his immense
love for children and to fulfil this he did not want to get married.
Surrogacy and IVF is providing options to
not only women but also men to choose single parenthood. However, one has to
understand that technology is not infallible. The chance of failure of IVF is
50%. Yusuf is the first such successful case in Goa.
With the entry of Kabir in his life, Yusuf
the pianist is experiencing new experiences in his life. He is solely
responsible for his son and changes the diapers, bathes and feeds him every few
hours. Yusuf said his son has been remarkably cooperative and seemed aware of
when his dad seemed tense. Yusuf said it was already obvious they were now a
team of two and their lives revolved around each other. Asked how the rest of
the family had responded to his decision, he said it was one of pure love and
connection. Indian officialdom he said was also very understanding and knew all
the rules and regulations and were very helpful. It was all very smooth and
sans any problems. His employers had organised a baby shower and were totally
backing him in this move.
His mom had spent some time but had
expressed her happiness at the manner in which her son had taken on
responsibilities and become a dad. He emphasised yet again “I am not looking
for a life partner. I have already set my path. I do not have the relationship
gene but the parenting gene is very strong. I wanted a child whom I could
always remember. Single father should not hide under the guise of getting
married. ‘He further said, ‘We should hide what we are doing, but rather show
happiness on it. I hope that I can inspire other married and unmarried men to
take care of their children. After all, it is not just the work of women”.
His plans to adopt children were rejected
several times and after much discussion he decided to opt for surrogacy. When
he reached his mid-30’s he realised the time had come to make the decisive
move. He came over to Goa for ‘in vitro
fertilization’ technique under supervision of Dr KedarPhadte. The surrogate was
from Mumbai who was experienced in this. Earlier in the month, she delivered
and Yusuf is now a father.
The blues in his life have long gone
replaced by the gentle tinkle of a baby’s laughter
