With values we are raised with and culture we live in, discussions associated with sex, marriage, relationship and its varied aspects is frail and not entertained. Sadly it is more about getting married than staying married with consent. Matters between the couple are advised to remain within and not be spilled beyond the walls of the house. The whispers though loud are ensured to remain unheard. We are ashamed, embarrassed and concerned of our survival amongst the society and being part of the same societal group are fairly aware with the fact that the society will be the foremost to pounce upon if our voice is raised.
Though we have adopted and imbibed the western culture, we have blended with the progress some things remain unchanged. Marriage, even today is arranged in our country, which is fairly common and not a novelty. It sometimes happens with consent of the ones to be married and most of the times with assent of the respected elders of the family. The ones to become a couple are not given much stress upon and it often leads to complexities in a relation which remain neglected for long and sometimes forever.
Abusive relation is not uncommon and not merely limited to poor and uneducated. Educated, rich women do fall prey to a knit which is physically and sexually unmannerly and damaging. Unfortunately our law doesn’t necessarily stress over happenings with in a marriage and thus marital rape is not even considered illegal in our nation. We let the crime happen under stash of ‘marriage’ concealing the crime and sufferings. How reasonable or justifiable is it to let the abuse happen and worship the same abuser as a spouse. Why do we let abuse happen openly with tag of being married. Is it way to silence the abuse and gateway to commit more with legal approval? Why are we so embarrassed to address the miserable occurrence and let it happen without even addressing the same? Why is marriage and its norms so complex in our society?
Isn’t it high time to let the women have a say in a relationship with backing of legal support system which indeed is helpful and without further wounding. For women to be more supportive towards other women and not degrade their status and alter their standings based on their circumstances and situations. For man to be expressive and conveying their desires in appropriate manner rather than imposing them to fulfil their needs. To bridge a relation on the basis of mutual consent and comfort and not to please the society and its norms. To have legal backing for illegal occurrences and ensuring justice for the same without humiliation.
Do not let the institution of marriage ruin the lives of innocent and let them survive with the traumatic experience throughout its life. Let matrimony build, nurture and prosper lives fruitfully and successfully and not ruin the same.
