and
I got quite a few movies in. I thoroughly enjoyed some of them whilst others
made me question life; because that’s how long it took for the movie to get going;
a lifetime. You should know that curating movies for the festival is a
difficult, exhausting and systematic process where movies that don’t hit the
benchmark are chucked out. Here are the ones that didn’t make the cut.
1. FINDING NIRMAL: There’s something
out there. And it feeds him fish food.
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Nirmal, the conspiracy theorist,
believes that he’s being watched by the ‘authorities’. Follow his journey as he
soon discovers he’s in (cue drum roll please)… a fish-tank. With the help
of a few friends like the plastic scuba man and treasure chest, he makes his
way to the four corners of his world. Well, it’s not a very long movie. Running
time: 4 minutes.
2. Confessions of a Glacier: If anyone can, RajniCan
One boat. One man. One glacier. Starring RajniCan, it’s the
story of the maiden voyage of Floating Rani across the Indian Ocean. With huge
hype built around the ship, nobody took the time to check its expiry date. Halfway
into the journey, the ship is set for a collision course with a glacier minding
its own business; just being all the glacier he can be. One man changes destiny
by putting himself between the boat and the glacier, literally. He actually
pushes the glacier away.
3. Whackula: The
count who couldn’t B positive.
Count
Whackula was like every other vampire. Except for one thing. He was allergic to
blood. Which really means he isn’t really like any of the vampires except for
the fangs and he burns in the sun. But which European doesn’t? Catch the
heart-warming film where this next-door vampire finds our what his purpose in
life really is.
4. Freddy Vs Jason Vs Savio: The
tropical nightmare
Set
in the international holiday destination – Goa, three Goan boys, Freddy, Jason
and Savio, find out that their friendship will be tested to the limits. All because
of one woman. Polka-dotted-dress-wearing Maria. Who will win her love and test
her faith? Everyday is a struggle, except when football is on TV. Don’t miss
this movie of horrible clichés.
5. Spa Trek: Boldly going
where no deep tissue massage has gone before
Capt
Jean Lu Picard and Data accidentally find themselves in the Jacuzzi together.
Their bodies touch and Data’s circuits go haywire. Will the federation except
their new found love? Will Worf tell Captain about his feelings for him? Set
your phasers to ‘What the hell!’ because this plot is going to get weird.
6. Life of Piles: The ‘back’
story of what actually happened on that boat
Pi
is stuck on a boat with a zebra, a tiger and an Orang-utan. He loves the
animals as if they were his own. That’s why he feels really bad when he eats
them; picks them clean to the bone. But
all that red meat has given Pi a big problem. Can he vanquish the demons that
lie in him? Or will the pain be too much for him to handle.
7. Air India One: Fasten your seatbelts, you aren’t going anywhere
The plan was to hijack the plane. The plan was to hold the
President for ransom. The plan was to avenge their comrades. What wasn’t part
of the plan was waiting 2 hours for the pilots to show up. Or technical snags before
take-off. Or PMSing hostesses that would make any hijacker tremble in his
boots. Watch the hijackers from hell give up their plan out of pure frustration
and sue the airlines for poor service, unsuccessfully.
