The World Health Organisation (WHO) report states that a person commits suicide every 40 seconds globally. As a counselor, I’ve sought to understand what could possibly be happening inside the mind of a suicidal person. Why does death appear to be a rational choice? We all have experienced disappointments, rejections, mistreatments and failures at some point in our lives and for most of us it’s a daily dose of bitter medicine. Because while some accept it believing all things will eventually work for good, others throw up worse things than what went in. So it would be right to conclude that, in the presence of a storm, our thinking determines whether we overcome or become fearful, angry and depressed.. I’ve listed some of the internal dialogues that a suicidal person believes and rehearses.
• “I can’t take this anymore”
• “No one loves me, I’m alone”.
•“There is no hope for me, things won’t change”. • “I’m a failure, I’m not good enough” • “Die! Die! I don’t deserve to live” • “I was unjustly treated, I will teach them a lesson”.
We all have an inner voice of judgment (VOJ), the internal critic that causes self doubt and negative thinking. Dwelling on these thoughts and believing them to be true can affect our daily functioning and relationships. But the good news is we can decide what we choose to meditate on day and night. A battle worth fighting is inside our mind.
Suicidal persons also have a war going on in their minds. For although they have a wish to die, they also have a parallel wish to be rescued. Most of suicidal persons send out pleas for help. Some may speak about their intentions, threaten or pen them down in songs and poems, some may isolate themselves, some may self mutilate and some may have a history of suicidal attempts. It would be unwise to label these signals of distress as ‘attention – seeking behaviours’ or ‘just a passing phase.’ Recognizing warning signs and timely intervention helps in prevention of suicidal deaths. So don’t overlook the perpetually angry neighbour, the withdrawn teenager, the unkempt student in the class, the alcoholic husband, the depressed wife and the chronically absent employee. They require help.
As parents, educators and counselors we have a responsibility to progressively train our children to understand that offences are inevitable but feeling bitter is optional, that trials produce character, that they can walk with their heads held high despite failures or personal mistakes, that happiness depends on the quality of one’s thoughts and that nerves of steel cannot be developed in the absence of opposition, rejection, criticisms, pressure and right believing.
